Time, huh?

Yesterday morning I woke up and I actually felt okay. I’ve had good days and bad days this past year, some more extreme than others. But yesterday was the first day that I woke up and felt good and “normal,” like I was doing more than just barely existing. I don’t remember the last time I truly felt that way. I’ve felt for a long time like I’m barely keeping my head above water and I’m just hanging on waiting to be sucked under completely. I don’t feel that way right now. I’ve been so preoccupied with what the future will hold that I’ve been forgetting to enjoy the present. That doesn’t mean I’m going to stop planning ahead; I am a planner and I don’t think I can change that about myself. I do think I can work on not worrying so much, though. Life is too short and precious to be spent worrying about what might or might not happen.

My home is still computer-less, though all of my data has been rescued. Tom has been running diagnostics on my machine and can’t figure out what’s wrong with it. I have sporadic internet access at his house and at work but it would be nice to get it back at home! I can access my flickr account from work again so I’ll try to take some stitching pictures soon and upload them.

The next big thing I’m going to obsess about is how to get out of debt. I have a TON of debt, mostly due to the divorce. I haven’t made headway since I am stretched pretty thin but I’m thinking it’s time to start making a plan to eradicate it. I’m not sure how, exactly; I may have to get creative. I’m inventorying my stitching supplies so maybe I’ll see what I can part with.

I can’t tell how many times I was told that it would “take time” to feel better. I’m not saying that I’m suddenly “better.” It’s been a traumatic year! But I’m hanging in there and I’m healing and I think I just might actually be okay in the end.

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5 Responses to “Time, huh?”

  1. Belinda (Clioratha) Says:

    {{{{hug}}}}

  2. Karen Says:

    You’ve had a lot of changes this year, and it seems like you’re really handling it all very well. I hear you on the worrying thing. I’m a worrier too and it’s a terrible habit to have–and hard to break! Truth is, it’s such a waste of time. If you can do something about a problem–take action. If you can’t–worrying won’t help anyway. {{{ Hugs }}}

  3. Melissa Says:

    You’re tough, you WILL be okay. :hug 🙂

    And I’m tagging you. 😀 Check my blog at http://www.missycor.u.yuku.com.

  4. JenJen Says:

    ((Jill)) Glad to hear that fog is lifting for you and you’re feeling better. 🙂

  5. Christine V Says:

    I tagged you on my blog, Jill. Go check it out!

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